I Am More

There's a girl in the corner with tear stains on her eyes
From the places she's wandered and the shame she can't hide
She says, "How did I get here? I'm not who I once was,
and I'm crippled by the fear that I've fallen too far to love."

But don't you know who you are
What has been done for you
Don't you know who you are

You are more than the choices that you've made
You are more than the sum of your past mistakes
You are more than the problems you create
You've been remade

Well she tries to believe it that she's been given new life
But she can't shake the feeling that it’s not true tonight
She knows all the answers and she's rehearsed all the lines
So she'll try to do better but then she's too weak to try

Don't you know who you are

You are more than the choices that you've made
You are more than the sum of your past mistakes
You are more than the problems you create
You've been remade

‘Cause this is not about what you've done
But what's been done for you
This is not about where you've been
But where your brokenness brings you to
This is not about what you feel
But He felt to forgive you
And what He felt to make you new

Who You Are, Tenth Avenue North
___________________________________________________________

Ah, wow. Last night, after Kairos, I get in my car and turn on my radio just to hear the bridge and the last chorus of this song.

Thank you, Lord. Your timing is impeccable.

I don’t know what it is about me and music, but it’s always running through my head. Lyrics…they speak to me in such profound ways sometimes. This song is another that is in the race for the story of my life. If I had a soundtrack for my life, I think Mike Donehey and Jason Ingram might’ve just secured a spot.

I’m a perfectionist…as of recent enlightenment, a neurotic perfectionist. Generally speaking, that’s not the kind of healthy perfectionism that is sometimes encouraged, or rather accepted. I set standards and expectations of myself that, at times, are unrealistic. What happens when expectations and reality don’t meet – disappointment. I’m seemingly always disappointed in myself for something I did or didn’t do…the freakin’ devil’s playground!!

After a while, it gets old. You get tired.

So you tend to just stop. Stop setting expectations and goals. Stop trying. Stop fighting. Stop believing: reference Verse 2.

But I am more than the choices that I’ve made. I am more than the sum of my past mistakes. I am more than the problems I create. I’ve been remade. Cause it is not about what I’ve done, but what’s been done for me. It is not about where I’ve been, but where my brokenness brings me to. It is not about what I feel but what He felt to forgive me, and what He felt to make me new.

…So thank you Lord for music that speaks Your truth. And thank you for being so interested in the details of my life that You know what I need to hear when I need to hear it most!

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.”
2 Corinthians 5:17 (ESV)

“Be sober-minded, be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.”
1 Peter 5:8 (ESV)

“The thief comes only to steal, kill, and destroy. I come that they may have life and have it abundantly.”
John 10:10 (ESV)